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So, today I went to my "Enhanced Re-employment Services program" at the local "I don't have a job" office. It was a bit harsh to switch around my schedule to get up early enough. I've basically switched my schedule around so I was going to bed at about 4:30 AM and waking up at about 1:00 PM. Getting up at 7:00 AM was a bitch. Anyway, I dragged my lazy ass up, took a shower and went off to be "enhanced" by the re-employment people. The actual experience wasn't that enlightening.

I arrived a bit late, to show "the man" who was still in control of  my life, and was promptly escorted to a conference room where about 10 other "dislocated workers" (as they referred to our current job description)  were sitting around. we were given a two hour presentation  broken up with a few cigarette breaks. The whole thing wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. There was quite a mix of people there, one woman that used to be a cashier, but aspired to go into "something different" after 6 years of cashiering, a few that looked to be regulars at the unemployment place since they recognized each other, a few other programmers there, but no other consultants (consultants, like me, pretty much look down on the rest of the world of programmers because we'll do 30 different jobs with lots of different systems and languages each year and a programmer will just work one job for years), and me.

We were given a bunch of forms to fill out, and a bunch of crap on what the "Dislocated Worker's Service" can provide to us. Not that much, as I quickly realized. They did produce a lot of paperwork. You have to understand that as a consultant, I'm working through agencies that are acting as my representative to the world of jobs out there. So looking for a job on my own is pretty much useless since these agents have cornered the market on the consulting jobs. So I can look for a job, but I wouldn't find anything within my pay scale without one of these agents. So, I'm not dissing the state's attempt to assist me, but it just doesn't apply for me. 

The highlight of my time there was the personal interview with a counselor that assessed your employment needs. He asked why I hadn't signed up for any of the various programs that the state provided, such as the "How to Write a Resume" class or the "How to Handle an Interview" class. I really felt like just telling them "Look you fucking dip shits, I'm a consultant, I work about 30 jobs a year, probably do about 50 interviews a year, my fucking job IS interviewing and resume writing to fit a job description, I don't need your fucking help!!! (especially not from someone that couldn't find a better job than working for the state telling cashiers how to enhance their careers)" But, I held back, and said, "I don't think I could benefit from most of these programs."

However, I did take one thing back from the program that made me sign up for one of their programs. I learned that there was some government grant cash available to do retraining for new jobs. So I signed up to talk to someone on Wednesday to talk my way into some of that cash for a few certification programs I've wanted to take (looks good on the resume). So I guess it turned out ok, wasn't that bad and I may get some free grant cash for free training. Hell, I'll take that!

As I walked in the door after this wonderful experience, the phone was ringing with an offer for a job, I guess I got some good karma by attending, who knows.



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